I am thankful for ...

I was reading the news yesterday … yes it was on-line and not an actual newspaper (hey, I went old school with my daily planer, don't take away ALL of my 21st century vices). I came across an article about a teenager that lost her fight with cancer. As a last wish she got to record Katy Perry's "Roar". The internet is full of articles like this. We read them, we cry, we thank God (or our higher power) for what we have, we spend an hour or so truly thankful and then we forget and start to complain again about how rough we have it. Traffic, bills, fights with our (ex)partners.    

As you sit down with family and friends tomorrow remember what you are thankful for. Try to make the feeling of gratefulness last longer then just one day. Of course we have the obvious … 
Family 
Friends
Home
Job
Health

And my not so obvious ...
My shoes (and clothes in general)
My ability to walk to the market and buy just about any kind of food I want
My books (all 385 of them)
My notebooks and journals (all 523 of them … yes I have a problem)
The fact that I figured out how to hook up my laptop to my TV
My humor
My ability to ignore things (if you ignore something bad it eventually goes away, its called Scarlet Syndrome)

No mater where you are tomorrow try to remember to be thankful for what you have … not for what you want. Yes, their is a difference. 

R.I.P

I just found out (on FaceBook of course) that the Black Rhino is now extinct. Check out www.geekexchange.com for more info.

Its amazing what we put up with day to day and not say or do anything. But … the slightest chance that all people may have the same rights and look out. I mean really, what affect does my marrying a man have on anybody's life but mine?

Sorry, I digress. 

Below is a list of animals/mammals/plants that we have lost since 1960. The list includes animals from North America. I , you , or your children will never see any of these animals in the wild ever again. 

2007	Columbia Basin Pygmy Rabbit	Brachylagus idahoensispop. 2	Douglas, Grant, Lincoln, Adams and Benton counties of Washington state	mammal
1994	Hadley Lake Limnetic Stickleback	Gasterosteussp. 12	Hadley Lake on Lasqueti Island, British Columbia	fish
1994	Hadley Lake Benthic Stickleback	Gasterosteussp. 13	Hadley Lake on Lasqueti Island, British Columbia	fish
1994	Pearson's Hawthorn	Crataegus pearsonii	Mississippi, Louisiana and Texas	plant
1992	Vancouver Island Wolverine	Gulo gulo vancouverensis	Vancouver Island, British Columbia	mammal
1988	Fish Lake Pyrg	Pyrgulopsis ruinosa	One spring in Esmeralda County, Nevada	mollusc
1988	Maryland Darter	Etheostoma sellare	Streams near the head of Chesapeake Bay in Maryland	fish
1988	Bachman's Warbler	Vermivora bachmanii	Nested in Missouri, Arkansas, Kentucky, Alabama, South Carolina, and Louisiana; wintered in Cuba and Isle of Pines	bird
1987	Dusky Seaside Sparrow	Ammodramus maritimus nigrescens	East coast of Florida	bird
1986	Banff Longnose Dace	Rhinichthys cataractae smithi	A marsh fed by hot springs near Banff, Alberta	fish
1985	Shortnose Cisco	Coregonus reighardi	Lakes Huron, Michigan and Ontario	fish
1984	Green Blossom	Epioblasma torulosa gubernaculum	Tennessee and Virginia	mollusc
1983	San Marcos Gambusia	Gambusia georgei	San Marcos River, Texas	fish
1978	Kingman's Prickly-pear	Opuntia superbospina	Mojave Desert, Arizona	plant
late 1970s	Amistad Gambusia	Gambusia amistadensis	Goodenough Spring, Texas	fish
1975	Phantom Shiner	Notropis orca	Rio Grande River in New Mexico and Texas	fish
mid 1970s	Lewis's Woodpecker, Georgia Depression Population	Melanerpes lewis pop. 1	Southwestern British Columbia and western Washington state	bird
1974	Tacoma Pocket Gopher	Thomomys mazama tacomensis	Pierce County, Washington state	mammal
1973	Carinate Duckwater Pyrg	Pyrgulopsis carinata	Spring in Duckwater Valley, Nye County, Nevada	mollusc
1971	Santa Cruz Pupfish	Cyprinodon arcuatus	Monkey Spring in Arizona	fish
1971	Zion Jimmyweed	Isocoma humilis	Washington County, Utah	plant
1971	Blue Walleye	Sander vitreus glaucus	Lake Erie, Lake Ontario, lower Niagara River and Lake Huron	fish
1970s	Acornshell	Epioblasma haysiana	Cumberland and Tennessee River systems in Alabama, Virginia, Tennessee and Kentucky	mollusc
1970	Clear Lake Splittail	Pogonichthys ciscoides	Clear Lake, California	fish
1969	Blackfin Cisco	Coregonus nigripinnis	Lake Huron and Lake Michigan	fish
1969	Tubercled Blossom	Epioblasma torulosa torulosa	Alabama, Illinois, Indiana, Kentucky, Ohio, Tennessee and West Virginia	mollusc
1968	Striped Bass, St. Lawrence Estuary population	Morone saxatilis sp. 3	Quebec	fish
1967	Angled Riffleshell	Epioblasma biemarginata	Alabama, Kentucky and Tennessee	mollusc
1967	Narrow Catspaw	Epioblasma lenior	Tennessee River system in Virginia, Tennessee and Alabama	mollusc
1967	Lined Pocketbook	Lampsilis binominata	Upper Chattahoochee and Flint River systems in Alabama and Georgia	mollusc
mid 1960s	Turgid Blossom	Epioblasma turgidula	Alabama, Arkansas and Tennessee	mollusc
1964	Bluntnose Shiner	Notropis simus simus	Rio Grande River in New Mexico and Texas	fish
1964	Lake Ontario Kiyi	Coregonus kiyi orientalis	Ontario	fish
1964	Bay Springs Salamander	Plethodon ainsworthi	Jasper County, Mississippi	amphibian
1963	Eskimo Curlew	Numenius borealis	Nested in Northwest Territories, wintered in Argentina	bird

I guess it really saddens me that most people don't really care. And yes … I know that extinction is the natural way. But how long until we are on the same list as the Black Rhino. 

R.I.P 

The need to …

I have the need to write. I have the need to paint. I have the need to sing. I have the need to be creative. I guess this entry will have to do for now. 

Consider yourself creativeized.

Bam

A millionaires check list , based on today's Power Ball, $400,000,000

Hollywood Hills house ($20,000,000)

A penthouse in NYC ($45,000,000)

Laguna Beach house ($10,000,000)

House on Lake Como ($15,000,000)

Paris pied-a-terre ($7,000,000)

Rolls Royce ($375,000)

Charity (undisclosed) True charity is anonymous

Total $97,375,000 +

Man , I'm I shallow. And yes ... I've put some thought into this.

What are we thankful for?

   Thanksgiving day. A day for getting together with family and friends. A day for eating. A day for drinking. But most of all a day to sit back and really count our blessings.

Things I am thankful for ...

Cher
My job, that I love
My house
My hair
My cat(s) and dogs, past and present
My ability to love and be loved
My Mac stuff
My relationships
My ability to drive to the store and buy whatever I need
My LV briefcase
And of course all my family and friends. 

The list can go on and on but I'll stop here. I am one lucky guy.
What are you thankful for?

Does grief have an expiration date?

   As a kid my family had many pets. Dogs, cats, rabbits, hamster ... well you get the idea. We were (are) an animal loving family. I don't actually remember having to say good-bye to any of them other then Denver, my beloved hamster. Maybe my parents spared me the pain. Maybe as a kid I didn't understand the concept of death. Or choose to ignore it. 

   I lost my dog Bruce to a ruptured tumor last week. It was sudden and fast. With in an hour of taking him to the vet he was gone. Just 24 hours ago I could not even think about him, let alone write about him without having a complete meltdown. The kind that makes your insides come to the surface and want to leap out of your body. For the last 10 days I've ignored my family and friends. I barely left the house let alone my bed. I just wanted to wallow in the pain. The pain that nobody could ever understand. It was all mine. And only I could feel it. I honestly believed that. I have since wised up. 

   Bruce was the first dog I had as an adult. I got him at  6 months and he left me at 10 years old. The pain I felt rivals nothing I've ever felt before. I've said it before but I'll say it again. I've lost family and friends but the loss of a beloved pet is a different pain. Neither loss is better or worse, but it is different. 

Now I'm dealing with the guilt. The guilt of not grieving. The guilt of not losing my shit every time I think of him. The guilt of being able to walk past a picture of him with out falling to my knees (literally) and sobbing. The guilt of being able to talk to others about how much joy he brought to my life without stopping in mid sentence and choking up. 

   As humans we have an incredible resilience system in place. We lose, we grieve, we move on. The point between grieving and moving on is different for all of us. But we eventually do move on. Can you imagine holding on to all our loses for our entire lives. Every loss we suffered chipping away at our hearts until it was impossible to get out of bed. Impossible to face another day? This is what makes it possible for me to write this tribute to the Almighty Bruce. 

   And the tears come, hallelujah ! What little guilt that was left is now lifted.

To all my republican friends ...

I know I go on and on about politics and how much I do not want Mr. Romney as our next President. Maybe if I "bullet" point some points you might understand my emotional outbursts.


- Mr. Romney's religious beliefs are not mine. They are his and should be kept in his place of worship with others who believe what he believes. He is free, as we

 all are, to practice his religion in and out of the church but just not in OUR (as in yours and mine) government.

- I am a gay man. That does not define all that I am but I do not want a president in office who thinks I am a second class citizen and does not deserve the same civil rights all other Americans receive solely based on my sexual orientation. Sexual orientation NOT sexual choice.

- I believe woman are equal to men. They deserve the same respect that men get in and out of the work place and in their personal lives. They have a right to do with their bodies as they choose. Please don't take that statement as "Pro-abortion" ... I am not. As a man I can not imagine the mental pain and anguish a woman faces in her choice. Her choice, not the governments. I am for educating children and young adults in the ways of the world. Not misleading them.

- Every American is entitled to healthcare. It should not be based on your socioeconomic status. I do not believe this as a hand out. As the wealthiest nation on earth we can afford it. I will be honest, I don't know all the in's and out's of Obamacare but neither do I know what Mr. Romney has in mind. And until then ...

- I believe in helping people who need help in a time of need. Not a hand out but a help up. I do not begrudge anybody who makes a large income the right to spend it the way they see fit. But just remember ... There but for the grace of God (go I). Yes I referenced God. But I'm not running for president ... yet.

I hope this helps, if you were even are curious. I guess I assumed you are just by the fact that I wrote it. Kind of egotistical of me I guess.

Now a note to my Dem friends ... this post is not to instigate a name calling, mud slinging discussion. Is it purely an opinion piece. A piece to help my friends understand my reasoning in this very emotional election. 







If you do post a reply please be kind and caring. I'm sure I'll have many more where you can let loose.

Peace,

David